Monday, January 18, 2010

Meeting Jacques By Accident - Traffic Magazine

There I stood on the corner of Gormannstraße and some other street, wrapped in dirty white, just another animal stuffed in natural darm, trying to look like a venturous, yet unpretentious snowmonster. I would die to say that I was wondering how I got here, since it reads like the beginning of a book that would sell pretty well, but I remembered every single step from my trashed desk to the front-door, how I rolled my cigarette and how I almost dropped it because I thought I saw a snowmonster, but it was just my reflection in one of the gallery windows. At the time in question I wasn't really wondering about anything, I just held on to the thought that I would invest in spaceships as soon as I had made my fortune with AdSense, just in case one of Emmerich's visions should become true. And then out of nowhere Jacques appeared in front of me, a huge paper roll between left arm and torso, we shook hands.

He was on his way to the printing shop, the paper roll being the third issue of "Traffic", he seemed happy. I said: "Ah, traffic, saw something 'bout that on facebook, so that's your magazine?" He said "yes", I complimented him on the layout, he highlighted the content. Before we went separate ways, Jacques handed me a copy of the first issue, so I could find out for myself. Since the magazine is subheaded "news to go", it seemed like a good idea to read it in the subway, lucky as I am my train got stuck between Janowitzbridge and Heinrich-Heine-Street for a while, so I had enough time to get a first impression. The editorial stuff of "Traffic" proves to be impressive, there are quite a few figures whose background show the peaks of German Feuilleton. I'm not even sure if there's a proper word for what the Germans call "Feuilleton" in the English language and I think the French would rather address it as "rubrique littéraire", while associating "le feuilleton" with something that's on TV, I wonder what went wrong when the Germans conquered the word, or rather got stuffed with it like an adipohepatic goose, one shouldn't blame them for everything, they have enough shame to carry as it is. However, the names read big shot and the words seem to keep up, I don't speak German too well, but I didn't feel awkward reading it which doesn't happen too often. I was happy to find a section on man perfume, which is really encouraging, up and till now I always felt the need to hide it or to pretend that I bought it as an emergency liquor supply. I also learned how to adjust a bow tie, how embittered Daniel Richter really is and that I rather shouldn't write a novel on Dubai, well, the latter I already knew. However, these are all things that I like to read (for free).


Grazziela Van Der Woodsen said...

Hello 1,2,3 Fun Club,
I just arrived in town from Ogemaw, Michigan and all my friends told me about your exciting blog.
Now I know which newspaper i shall read first.
Thanks for your awesomeness!

Tony Abstract said...

Thank you right back!